How Top Leaders Use Emotional Intelligence to Stay Ahead
Posted on 23rd March 2025 at 07:24
Why Emotional Intelligence is a Leader’s Superpower
Imagine walking into a high-stakes meeting where tensions are running high. Two executives are locked in disagreement, and all eyes turn to you. In that moment, your response will determine whether the discussion escalates into conflict or transforms into a productive dialogue. This is where emotional intelligence (EI) separates top leaders from the rest.
Leadership isn’t just about making strategic decisions—it’s about understanding people, managing emotions, and inspiring action. The world’s most successful leaders—from Oprah Winfrey to Satya Nadella—master the art of emotional intelligence to build influence, resilience, and long-term success.
If you’re ready to develop your own leadership edge, book a Strategy Call here and start enhancing your emotional intelligence today.
The Science Behind Emotional Intelligence and Leadership
Neuroscience shows that emotional intelligence is more predictive of leadership success than IQ. According to research by Daniel Goleman, EI accounts for nearly 90% of the difference between high-performing leaders and their less effective counterparts (Goleman, 1998).
Emotional intelligence consists of five core components -
Self-awareness
The ability to recognise and understand your own emotions is the foundation of emotional intelligence. Great leaders are deeply attuned to how their feelings shape their decisions, behaviours, and interactions with others. Self-awareness allows you to anticipate emotional reactions and adjust accordingly.
Pay attention to emotional triggers. Recognise what situations cause frustration, excitement, or stress, and reflect on why they have that effect.
Use journaling or self-reflection. Write down moments of strong emotions and analyse the patterns that emerge.
Seek outside perspectives. Sometimes, those around us see our blind spots more clearly than we do.
Self-regulation
The ability to manage emotions effectively means staying calm and composed even in high-pressure situations. Leaders who master self-regulation don’t allow stress or frustration to dictate their actions—they pause, assess, and respond wisely.
Practice mindfulness. Regular meditation or breathing exercises help develop emotional control.
Reframe negative thoughts. Instead of thinking, This is a disaster, shift to This is a challenge I can learn from.
Respond instead of reacting. Take a few seconds before speaking when faced with conflict or criticism.
Motivation
Emotionally intelligent leaders tap into their own emotions and the emotions of others to drive passion, commitment, and high performance. Rather than being driven by external rewards alone, they find intrinsic motivation that fuels their leadership.
Clarify your purpose. Understanding why you do what you do makes it easier to push through challenges.
Create a culture of motivation. Inspire your team by showing enthusiasm and resilience in the face of obstacles.
Turn setbacks into fuel. See challenges as opportunities to grow rather than failures.
Empathy
True leadership is not just about strategy and vision; it’s about understanding the people you lead. Empathy is the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes and consider their perspective, feelings, and challenges.
Listen more than you speak. Pay attention not just to words but to tone and body language.
Validate emotions. Even if you don’t agree with someone, acknowledging their feelings fosters trust and connection.
Show compassion through action. Support team members in meaningful ways, whether by offering guidance or simply being present.
Social skills
Leadership isn’t just about making decisions—it’s about building strong relationships, fostering collaboration, and navigating conflicts with emotional intelligence. Great leaders create environments where people feel valued, understood, and motivated to work together.
Encourage open communication. Create a culture where feedback flows freely in both directions.
Master conflict resolution. Address tensions early with constructive conversations rather than letting resentment build.
Build strong professional networks. Meaningful relationships open doors to opportunities, mentorship, and collaboration.
Top leaders excel in these areas, allowing them to navigate pressure, build high-performing teams, and foster a culture of trust.
Real Leaders Who Master Emotional Intelligence
Howard Schultz - Leading with Empathy at Starbucks
When Howard Schultz took over Starbucks, he didn’t just focus on profits—he prioritised connection and emotional intelligence. Schultz believed that treating employees with respect and understanding was the key to customer loyalty and long-term success. He introduced healthcare benefits for part-time employees, created programs to support workers, and built a people-first culture.
His leadership proved that emotional intelligence isn’t ‘soft’—it’s a competitive advantage that fuels business growth.
Jacinda Ardern - A Masterclass in Crisis Leadership
During her time as New Zealand’s Prime Minister, Jacinda Ardern demonstrated how emotional intelligence strengthens leadership in times of crisis. Her response to national tragedies showcased empathy, transparency, and resilience, earning global recognition for her ability to lead with both strength and compassion. Ardern’s ability to remain calm under pressure and make emotionally intelligent decisions reinforced trust among her people.
5 Ways to Use Emotional Intelligence to Stay Ahead
1. Strengthen Self-Awareness to Improve Decision-Making
Think about the last time you made a decision under pressure—maybe it was responding to an unexpected challenge at work or handling a difficult conversation. In moments like these, emotions can cloud judgment if you're not aware of them. Great leaders understand that emotions influence choices. Developing self-awareness helps you pause, reflect, and make intentional decisions rather than reactive ones.
Great leaders understand that emotions influence choices. Being aware of your emotional triggers prevents impulsive decisions and promotes strategic thinking.
Pause before reacting. Take a breath to assess the situation logically.
Reflect daily. Identify patterns in your emotional responses to improve self-regulation.
Seek feedback. Others can provide insights into blind spots in your leadership style.
2. Master Self-Regulation to Stay Cool Under Pressure
Picture a leader in a high-stakes negotiation. Tensions rise, voices sharpen, and yet, the most respected person in the room remains composed. Self-regulation isn’t about suppressing emotions—it’s about managing them effectively. Leaders who master this skill remain level-headed in crisis moments and set the emotional tone for their teams.
When stress levels rise, emotional intelligence helps leaders maintain composure and clarity.
Use the 6-second rule. Count to six before responding in high-pressure situations.
Reframe setbacks. Shift your mindset from ‘failure’ to ‘learning opportunity.’
Build emotional resilience. Regular meditation and mindfulness enhance self-regulation (Davidson & McEwen, 2012).
3. Leverage Motivation to Inspire Others
Motivation isn’t just about setting goals—it’s about connecting deeply to why those goals matter. Top leaders don’t just chase personal success; they create an environment where their teams feel driven to excel. Think about a time when you felt truly inspired by a leader. Chances are, they made you see your work as meaningful rather than just another task to complete.
Top leaders don’t just chase personal success—they inspire teams to achieve shared goals.
Connect work to purpose. People perform better when they see meaning in their roles.
Model a growth mindset. Show that setbacks are part of progress.
Celebrate small wins. Recognising achievements fuels long-term motivation.
4. Develop Empathy to Build Trust and Influence
Imagine walking into a room where you don’t feel heard or valued. Now imagine a leader who takes the time to listen, acknowledge your concerns, and make you feel understood. That’s the power of empathy. The best leaders don’t just understand emotions—they use that understanding to foster trust, resolve conflicts, and strengthen relationships.
Empathy isn’t just about understanding others—it’s about making people feel seen, heard, and valued.
Listen more than you speak. Active listening strengthens relationships.
Put yourself in others’ shoes. Understand challenges from different perspectives.
Address team concerns proactively. Employees who feel valued are more engaged and productive.
For a deeper dive into how empathy fuels leadership success, read my book Beyond Limits.
5. Sharpen Social Skills to Build Stronger Teams
Social intelligence is the key to effective leadership and collaboration.
Master conflict resolution. Handle disagreements constructively rather than avoid them.
Encourage open communication. Psychological safety boosts team innovation.
Network with purpose. Strong relationships lead to better opportunities and business growth.
For additional strategies on leadership success, visit my Resources Page or watch my YouTube playlist for affirmations and leadership insights.
Final Thoughts - Lead with Emotional Intelligence Now
The best leaders in the world don’t just rely on intelligence and experience—they master the human element of leadership. Emotional intelligence gives you the power to make better decisions, inspire teams, and navigate challenges with confidence.
If you want to take your leadership to the next level, start today.
Your ability to lead with emotional intelligence starts with a single step. Book a Strategy Call now and gain the leadership edge you deserve.
What’s one leadership challenge you’ve faced that emotional intelligence could have improved? Drop a comment below—I’d love to hear your thoughts!
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